Today, August 22nd, is National Rainbow Baby Day. A Rainbow Baby is a baby born shortly after the loss of a previous baby due to miscarriage, stillbirth or death in infancy. This term is given to these special rainbow babies because a rainbow typically follows a storm, giving us hope of what’s to come.
Talking about our loses is hard and not something we necessarily see discussed. But I feel like this rainbow movement is changing that. We are opening up about our pasts, talking freely about our pain and letting others know that they are not alone.
1 in 4 Women experience a miscarriage.
I have been blessed with a beautiful rainbow baby girl, Everly Gale Musgrove. She was born after 2 early miscarriages. Personally my miscarriages (to me) were more like road blocks. At the time I was just so ready to be pregnant with our 2nd child. It took us 9 months to get pregnant with Everly and during those months we lost 2 babies. Everly was a breath of relief because she stuck. After 10 weeks I could breath knowing I would get to hold a baby in my arms.
Now, after the loss of our 3rd daughter, I look back and can’t help but think how naive I was. I’ve experienced a second trimester loss unlike anything I’d ever imagined but I often find myself thinking about how others have experienced something worse and “at least I didn’t loose her at the end” but how unfair am I being to myself.
On a day where we are supposed to celebrate our Rainbow babies I want to use my platform to remind ya’ll (and myself) that it is OK TO NOT BE OK!! It is OK to hurt and cry and mourn the loss of your baby, no matter how far along you were. You don’t have to tell yourself that someone else’s pain is greater than yours because in the end we are all mothers missing a baby. Whether you saw your baby, heard their heartbeat, felt them kick or none of the above. There is no right or wrong way to feel. Today is a no requirement, no conditions day of love for all Rainbow Baby’s.
Celebrate your Rainbow baby’s today, and everyday.